Cat story by Ronni Bennett


Oliver

With her permission, I am posting here Ronni’s New Year story, a gem, which deserved better than a small place in a comment –starring my friend Ollie.
Ronni’s blog, Time Goes By, is here and you can click here to read more of her Oliver stories.

Wishing you a very happy 2007, Claude – and the foie gras was fantastic last evening. I cannot resist, however, telling the cat story that goes with it:

This is very rich stuff, so I prepared just a few slices on a plate with some cornichon and part of that excellent baguette from the local bakery.

As I think I mentioned, I never go out on New Year’s Eve. My ritual for decades is to stay home alone with a book I’ve wanted to read and to be asleep before midnight.

I had a fun book to finish this year – Lisey’s Story. I arranged the comfortable chair in my new library just right, with the bright red throw to keep my legs warm (it’s cold here in Portland this weekend). I carried in a napkin, utensils and the book.

I then brought in the plate with the foie gras and accoutrements, setting it on the table next to the reading chair and I arranged the lighting. As I returned to the kitchen to get the one last item – a glass of wine, the phone rang – a friend with new year’s wishes and we chatted for 10 or 15 minutes.

With wine in hand, I returned to the library to find…

…THE CAT EATING THE FOIE GRAS!!!

To undertand my shock – greater than it might otherwise be – it is necessary to know that this cat, Ollie by name, eats only dry food and when, on occasion, I’ve meant to give him a treat from my dinner such as a piece of chicken, he has walked away in disdain. He has never shown the slightest interest in human food. He has never once in two and a half years stolen food from the table or counter.

So, I was struck dumb for a moment.

He looked over his shoulder at me only briefly and quickly returned to greedily gobbling down the foie gras as if I’d starved him for the past week or two.

When I shouted, “Ollie”, in a tone meant to scare the living sh** out of him, he all but shrugged. Then, getting the idea that I wasn’t pleased, he grabbed the final slice of foie gras and darted under the bed in the guest room where I couldn’t possibly reach him.

And then I laughed. What else was there to do. This over-bred cat on which I spent way too much money, who has never exhibited the least interest in my food, developed an instant taste for haute cuisine – to match his fancy lineage, I suppose. Next thing he’ll be asking for Norwegian smoked salmon or delicately roasted quail.

Fortunately, there was plenty more of the foie gras. I prepared another plate for myself and snuck into the library with it when he wasn’t looking, closing the French doors behind me.

I wished than that I knew how to say the F word in cat language, but I think he got the point when he couldn’t get into the library, but he could certainly smell the foie gras I WAS EATING.

So we both had a delicious meal of the extravagant gift you brought when you visited and I’m sure if he could speak English (or French), Ollie would thank you too.

A very happy new year to you, Claude, from both of us.

The photo of the guilty party, was taken when I visited with Ronni and Ollie, or should I say Sir Oliver, the gourmet, last October.

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8 thoughts on “Cat story by Ronni Bennett

  1. Hilarious story… 😀

    I am afraid that, personally, my first reaction would have been to pull out the ‘yellow pages’ and start looking for the closest Taxidermist.

    But on the other hand the ‘F’ word in any language seems most appropriate on this particular occasion. I admire Ronni’s patience. Thanks for sharing the story Claude. 🙂

  2. Loved this story and I applaude Ollie for his fine taste in dining. Trouble is, I have a feeling it’s back to that dry mix for him.
    Thanks for sharing this, Claude.

  3. What a wonderful story for cat lover’s and those who are not so loving. One of my cats has decided she likes people food, and she will go to any lengths to get it, especially if it is turkey. She is positively ecstatic when she smells turkey. The other cat cannot be bothered to notice.

    Ollie has good taste, doesn’t he? Next I’d ask for lobster, were I he!

  4. I have followed Ollie’s adventures for a long time. This one is priceless. Where would Ronni be without this delightful pet for company. What a great writer she is. Thanks for sharing. . .to both of you.

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